Author Glenda L. Hunter

Author Glenda L. Hunter

Friday, January 19, 2018


I just wrote about loss and I thought the next step is grief. At the end of the article on loss I gave a couple of suggestions you can do in helping deal with said loss but in no way do I think it will take the total grief away. Before I begin first I looked up the word grief to see what good Mr. Webster has to say, "deep and poignant distress caused by or as if by bereavement".  I looked in the thesaurus to see what other word could be used for poignant that would help the meaning become more alive. There are a number of words but the one I find that describes the loss of a loved one is 'heartbreaking'. Breaking of one's heart is really what happens at the time of a loved ones passing. We hold our deep feelings in our heart. How many time have you said "I love you with all my heart"? I know I have said that little phrase more than once. When I say it I want the person to know I love
them greatly. So when a dear loved one passes it breaks our heart. We long for them to be back. We have a deep pain that no one can really touch. Other people will have their own pain. I find myself unhappy, miserable, the sorrow is great and the feeling of woe is on me and takes over. The grieving has become full blown. The period of grieving has begun. How long is this period? Maybe you could answer that for me. I cannot tell you it will only last for a week, a month or even a year, it will last as long as it needs to. But the key is not to wallow in the loss and lose sight of the living. You have a life here and now. You have people that are still here that love you and need you. I know it doesn't feel like it because all feels lost. That does not mean others replace the one love you just lost but they need you. When the person was living you loved more than just them so in their passing you don't stop loving others in your life. Sometimes our behavior is read by others that we have stopped loving them when we get so overwhelmed with the grieving we stop living as we should. We are on a shutdown mode to everything around us. I have never lost a child or spouse but I have others that have for a time they lose sight of everyone around them. I have seen the great pain and loss in their eyes that goes deeper than one can explain. If that is you I understand the loss is great but allow someone to help you the best they can. For any loss try these things to help you get to through the days of your grief. Find that good friend that you can cry on their shoulder or that will just sit with you in silence. Think about making a quit or pillow out of pieces of their clothing to help with the visual part of the healing. Write about how deep you feel the loss. Write about the things you think no one will understand. No one really knows your hurt like you. But do keep in mind that when a person says they understand they are trying to help in a hurting situation. Remember everyone has grieved or will we should love and grow from each other's experience. We need each other. Grieve as you must, hold onto anything of theirs that helps, move at your pace but don't shut out the rest of the world. Allow God to help heal your broken heart. Psalms 147:7a "He heals the brokenhearted" Except the help of others and God during your grieving. Have a great day.  

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